Internet and Science Humour Page


I'm planning to collect here those odds and ends of humour that travel across the Net and across the Xerox machines of the world. Only the ones that I think are funny, of course :-) I'm sorry so few of these are properly attributed. Please write if you claim the authorship or know the author of one or more!
Old Standards Never Die
This may be apocryphal, but it's pretty good.
The Rules of Engineering
All too true, every one of them.
101 Things Not To Do on Usenet
maybe it's a little long, but it's good...
How Many Mailing List Subscribers Does It Take . . .
to change a light bulb? 1,331. This is why . . .
How People Explain Car Accidents
probably a pre-Internet classic
Product Warnings for Physicists
found on a door in our Physics Dept
Microsoft Upgrade Announcement
At last, Mr. Bill finds ground on which he can really compete with Linux!
Children's Property Laws
actually, another Microsoft giggle.
The Never-Shown MicroSoft ST:TNG Episode
well, who can resist another slam at Microsoft?
Source Code for Microsoft Marketing
and on a related note Microsoft Acquires Vatican
hey, why stop there? USA becomes MS Subsidiary
Navigating by Microsoft
If Microsoft Made Cars. . .
a recent MS slam from the print media
Microsoft and the Light Bulb
Inevitable, right?
One Fine Day in Brussels
Have you ever used MS tech support? You'll appreciate this one.
If Operating Systems Were Airlines
an old classic slightly updated
Pentium Jokes
One Explanation of Japanese Commercial Success
(hmm, sounds too real to be funny)
A Man Page for Our Times
The Future of Public Broadcasting?
The McDonnel-Douglas Customer Satisfaction Survey
The Physics of Santa Claus
thank you Joachim Verhagen and Linda Harden
A Christmas Carol for Software Engineers
and a Christmas Carol for Unix Users
and a Christmas Carol for Contract Spec Writers
Eight Basic Principles of Project Management
The SIGGRAPH that never was
First International Mad Science Conference
Silly Stories about Public Malefactors
Alleged Commercial Slogan misTranslations
Exercises for Desk Jockeys
Voice Response System Counseling
Amusing .signature blocks
found hither and yon
Strangers on a Train
A Crisis in the Educational System
This one has been represented to me as a true newspaper article. . .
A Bovine Guide to Ideologies

For more jokes:

ftp://ftp.in.umist.ac.uk/pub/Text/scijokes.zip
ftp://ftp.princeton.edu/pub/science.jokes.tar.gz
http://www.princeton.edu/~pemayer/ScienceJokes.html
http://www.fys.ruu.nl/~nienhuys/scijokes.html


de@daclarke.org
webmaster@ucolick.org
De Clarke
UCO/Lick Observatory
University of California
Santa Cruz, CA 95064
Tel: +1 408 459 2630
Fax: +1 408 454 9863